Soledad's Fight for Recovery

OK! So I have managed....somehow....to drag myself out of the pit of self-loathing/dispair. What is it about us EDers that makes us feel so at home in that black hole. For some reason we see it as hospitable...What is up with that? I mean REALLY people. Bleakness is not your friend..... bleakness makes you a boring person.........and we might be a fucked up bunch but I for one am the FURTHEST thing from boring..... In all seriousness though.....thank you for the encourgaement and kind words everyone. It really really helped. I think two things helped turn my mood around. 1) The UPS guy at the door this morning 2) The party 1) At 7;30 my phone rings. I jump out of bed like a mad woman and answer. Greg is shaving and there are like 8 things going through my head....1) OMG my parents (they are in Egypt) 2) OMG my Mexican friend J who doesn't speak any English and is 8 months preganant and living here. 3) OMG I am on call and it is the crisis centre calling. 4) OMG my grammie. Well it turned out to be a UPS guy buzzing us b/c he had a package for Greg. So I stubled downstairs in Greg's housecoat and take this unmarked package from him. All the while I was trying not to giggle TOO much at his short shorts. WHY DO THEY MAKE UPS GUYS WEAR THOSE????? NO ONE LOOKS GOOD IN THEM! It is a BAD fashion choice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Of course then there was this unmarked package waiting for us. and given the relentess contact that we have had from Greg's ex we were a little nervous to open this. It was a very ominous package. No return address. and inside a plain white envelop with nothing more than his name and our address. Poor Greg was like..."I don't like the look of this" SO I knew I wasn't being totally paranoid.... It turned out to be good news. and interview for a really great firm. YEAH!!! But the point of this little story is that I got TOTALLY stressed out this am because of UPS! I think I need to chill a little and enjoy things a wee bit more........like the PARTY!!! This is my number two reason for being all excited... So it turns out like 30!! people are coming to the party for Greg and his buddy! 30 people in our APT! It is going to be HILARIOUS! I am excited. I really wanted to do a make your own cupcake statio, but no one would let me:( BUMMER. I do think I am going to put giant pieces of felt against the wall for people to write on as they get super loaded. That is always fun!!!!!!! Hehehehe I am making a pledge to myself to try to enjoy things more. I have been so off and sooooo stressed out. I need to enjoy life. So tonight I have class, but after this I am going to go home and play my guitar! and snuggle with my fiancee. peace