Soledad's Fight for Recovery

Hey All, So it was all in all a reasonably good weekend. I defiantly had some eating issues on Sunday, due to a particularily bingey Saturday, but things seemed to have evened themselves out today. I think I need to try a little harder and I feel lazy in my recovery. I feel posting more might help me out a little. I already know why I had a such a bingey Saturday....I feel one of my closest friends drifting away (Note I am not blaming this friend for my bingeyness). Our lives are going in totally different directions, or so it seems. This really hurts. She is with this man that she is WAY too good for but really seems to care about so what the hell can I say? I guess I am in part to blame for all of this...I mean I recognize I am resentful...not of her relationship, but of the fact that I feel she doesn't have any time for me. We used to be so close. I guess all of this is normal, but it sucks and I feel like a bad friend. FUCK. Also I am terrified that I am not going to make any new friends. I am not great with people. Too outspoken, too quick to jump. I am scared Greg will go home and I will have no friends. I know I hold people at arms length, including all of you in the blog community......I am working on this I really am. But this is making my relationship with food really complicated. So that is what is going on with me. I have eaten really well today though and been to the gym and biked to work. Now I am at work, looking out the window. I like this new job a lot.